Hurt People, Hurt People

The problem with a lot of us is that we really don’t take time to heal when we are hurt. The other day, I was thinking about some of the reasons I feel hurt, and a lot of the hurt really comes back to me. I had to admit that I ALLOWED someone to hurt me. I can’t place 100% of the blame on that person at all. Yes, that person consciously did some hurtful things, but I did participate in a situation that could be hurtful. So when you’re hurt, your ego is bruised and you direct all your anger toward one person when in reality you are upset at yourself for not seeing through that person. Upset for not stopping the situation at a certain point.

I’m slowly realizing that ok, B, you have to take some of the blame on this one. There was no way this person could do ALL that to you without your active participation. Now, after acceptance, I have to just enjoy myself and the great things that are happening in my life so that I can fully heal. I told one of my friends that if today, I met someone new and he’s like “hey, can I take you out on a date?” I would probably ask him to call me in a month and ask me again. I don’t want the next person in my life to be a rebound or replacement. I want them to have my full attention.

Hurt People, Hurt People. That is the simplest way to say it. If we are still hurt, then somehow or another, we will hurt someone else. I have to let God have his way in my life so that I don’t hurt someone else and so that when I smell the scent of upcoming hurt, I know how to handle myself better. I will know when I need to adjust, stay, or walk away.

I truly have to meditate on 1 Corinthians 13. If someone is selfish, mean, never there, impatient… that’s not love! To keep from hurting we really need to understand what TRUE LOVE is, so that when someone comes around and they don’t understand what LOVE is, you know in your heart that although they may feel love for you they might not truly LOVE you the way you deserve to be loved.

I am declaring to myself through my process of healing, that I will pray to God to remove all the weight from my heart. I don’t want to be bitter; I don’t want to be hurt. I want to love like I have never loved before. Today in Bible study before church, a man commented saying that when Jesus said we have to deny ourselves, it’s kind of comparable to when you are married and your wife is stuck on the side of the road and you have to DENY yourself watching the football game to go to wherever she is and get her. That to me is the maturity needed to truly love. Deny yourself and what you want for the good of the other person.

I refuse to continue the cycle. I will not allow my hurt to assist me in hurting someone else. Loved people, Love People.

Love,

BK